say my name, bitch

In a news item once confined to my late-night fantasies, Chinese tourism authorities are creating the world's first-ever "women's town," according to this article.

The town, designed to boost tourism, will rely on a concept of "women rule and men obey," and will even punish men for disobedience. The article notes: "The motto of the new town would be 'women never make mistakes, and men can never refuse women's requests,' Chinese media have reported. When tour groups enter the town, female tourists would play the dominant role when shopping or choosing a place to stay, and a disobedient man would be punished by 'kneeling on an uneven board' or washing dishes in restaurant, media reports said."

The $26 million effort started in 2005. Authorities said it would be ready in between three and five years. Pack your ankle restraints and sign me up.

what not to wear

The sun's return has inevitably made for all sorts of fashion mistakes. I'd love to hear your stories of pasty skin, back hair and toe fungus. I'm sure fashion police deputies were out in full force last weekend.

Ironically, the biggest infraction I saw had absolutely nothing to do with summer apparel. While enjoying a cup of coffee Saturday morning, my friend Lily and I spotted two women wearing pajama pants and cowboy boots. With the boots tucked into the PJ pants.

No level of caffeine jolt makes that acceptable.

success

Another great weekend in C-Town. Friday, we went to the Shanty Shack as planned, and once again enjoyed an eclectic mix of dance beats that literally ranged from Garth Brooks to Juvenile. I know that same randomness has given the Shanty Shack its critics, but there don't seem to be many. Once again, the Warm Springs Road venue was packed. And in my mind, it didn't disappoint. Cheap drinks, no fights and a cool guy selling light-up roses. Perfect.

One of my friends kept pointing to an unusually high hot-guy quotient, but the jury's still out on that one. Agree or disagree, you help but notice the many unique characters who were out and about, including one vertically challenged guy who was flaunting some serious game. Watching him slow dance with a girl -- while his head was strategically placed near her anatomical assets -- was one of the biggest highlights of our night. Pictures will follow. Hopefully.

Other noteworthy sights? For the first time ever, I saw a guy text somebody will dancing with a girl. Bad form? I say yes.

And, of course, we were hit by the ominous male presence who comes to a club unaccompanied, creepily follows girls around and can't grasp the concept of a cold shoulder. For years, I thought such a force existed only at high school dances and college parties without alcohol. False.

Happy Monday, everyone.

what's going on this weekend?

TGIF. Finally.

I predict this weekend will pretty low-key downtown, especially in view of the fact that next weekend's Cinco de Mayo should generate some pretty big crowds. Btw...I'm writing about Cinco de Mayo parties -- or, if you prefer, fiestas -- in my next column, so if you know of anything that's going on, drop me a comment.

Anyway, back to the weekend...the girls and I will probably go dancing tonight, barring any major last-minute drama. We'll probably either head downtown or venture beyond our comfort zone and revisit the Shanty Shack (4475 Warm Springs Road). I haven't been there since I wrote a column about it a little while ago, and I'm aching for some Pussycat Dolls spiked with a shot of Gretchen Wilson. You get the picture.

Other weekend activities? I'm hoping to hit the gym, since it seems like everyone in the entire world has come to the realization that they are three pounds overweight and consequently have taken up diets. Seriously.

Along those lines, I think I'm also going to dabble in the world of swimsuit shopping, which is perhaps every woman's worst nightmare. Can't live with it, can live without it...right?

Hope everyone has a great weekend. Can't wait to hear your stories.

what's going on tonight?

It's a pretty standard Thursday night in the Columbus area. Mellow out with the usual open mic night at Fountain City Coffee. It's free, and the action starts at 8 p.m.

On the completely opposite end of the spectrum, you can also get down and dirty on the dance floor at The Vault. DJ Che spins starting at 8 p.m. It's $5, but ladies are free.

If you want live music, you have two pretty good options. San Diego-based rock act After the Crash hits Soho Bar & Grill at 10 p.m. The indie rock act was formed when its lead singer, once a millionaire stockbroker, lost everything. The show is $5...ladies are in free.

Finally, don't hesitate to try out Broad Street Blues (913 Broad St., Phenix City), where house band Peggy Jenkins and the Rhythm Roosters will entertain as usual. The show starts at 9:15 and it's $5.

what's in a name?

It's easy to forget the role names play in our romantic inclinations. In grade school, I never went so far as to practice my cursive by scrawling my crush's name on college-ruled notebook paper. But in my later days, I do admit to getting caught up in Bennifer fever and trying to create cute little "we have no individual identities" couple monikers for my romantic pursuits.

Unfortunately, it never really worked...even though I always wanted to fall in love with a guy named Lars so our name could be Sonars.

Still can't get enough of that TomKat creativity? Now, USA today has an electronic celebrity name generator where you can type in your name (first or last) and your partner's name (first or last) and get a couple name.

I just tried "Jessica" (Simpson) and "John" (Mayer) and ended up with Jesohn.

The results aren't nearly as promising for Tom and Katie, who end up as Tomtie. Or Brad and Angelina, also known as Bradina.

Oh well. It's a worthwhile distraction, almost good enough to take you back to the days of bad cursive and otherwise useless binder dividers.

just hit "send"?

While I'm on the topic of technology, I'll encourage you to check out this article about "Send: The Essential Guide to Email for Office and Home." It's a new book about "e-mail mistakes and how to avoid them." The book's central focus lies in the way in which the "Send" button often promotes impulsiveness and rash emotions. And, in turn, disasters.

The article notes, "We imagine it (e-mail) as a casual private message that vanishes into the ether. In fact, it's likely to be far more permanent than any paper communication. E-mails can be stored with ease by the recipients and by third parties, such as the corporations from which they are sent."

The book, basically, is an etiquette guide...addressing everything from why it's not cool to address your professor with "hiya" in an e-mail to the implications of Britney Spears' 2006 decision to dump K-Fed via BlackBerry.

Do e-mail manners deserve a spot in book retailers' shelves? Absolutely. Take it from the girl who was dumped via a changed relationship status on MySpace. Do you think technology will ever progress to a point where that kind of breakup is not only expected, but accepted?

What's the biggest e-mail mistake you've made? What, if anything, would it take to get you to circulate a once-private e-mail out of rage?