Phone home. Or not.

Tell me if this sounds familiar: "If you need to get in touch, send me a Facebook message. I lost my phone again."

It seems like I see that status update at least once a week. Usually on Sunday mornings.

Fortunately, Jezebel has this handy guide for what to do if you get drunk and lose your phone and wallet. An excerpt:

The first thing you should do when you realize your phone is missing is to try to call it. If someone picks up and offers to return it, great! You've found a human unicorn!

If there's no answer or it goes straight to voicemail, borrow someone else's phone, call your provider immediately and suspend service on your line. This isn't the same as cancelling; you can always restart service again if you find your phone.

I've temporarily misplaced my phone in the past, but I've had no major casualties. Perhaps that's because I have an old-school calling device that can't access the Internet. It's not exactly a hot item on the market right now.

Probably my biggest moment of panic was when I realized my phone had been sitting in a Winn-Dixie for hours. I arrived, introduced myself and found my phone waiting for me at the customer service desk.

Crisis averted.

Share your cell phone horror stories in the comments section.