digits of desperation

I rolled home around 2 a.m. on a recent Saturday morning and knew that, after downing an obligatory 12 Krystals, I'd be going to sleep. Without interruptions.
For the first time in months, there was absolutely no one with reason to drunk dial me. I'd severed ties with my long-term DD standby, and I realized with disbelief that none of my cross-country crushes had feelings strong enough to interrupt a mid-party keg stand. Or hookup.
Exchanging digits brings to mind the anxiety and promise that accompany entry into a new romantic relationship. But phone calls can also signal the dark desperation that so many of us seek to avoid.
At least every cell phone contact list holds one number begging to be deleted. It's the former fling who broke up with you on Instant Messenger, or the ex who forgot your birthday and never thought twice before accepting your offer to pay for dinner.
You keep their numbers intact because they call under the guise of friendship. Or, maybe they don't even call. Maybe you just want to be ready if they do.
When we talked about this dark side of digits today, my friend Nicole recommended identifying such contacts on your phone as "Do Not Answer," or any other more appropriate cuss word.
I agree wholehartedly. Phone calls make us feel needed, especially when they come in the wee hours of the morning. But keeping a contact simply as a "hold-out" when "what if?" feelings aren't reciprocated is bound to carry as much comfort as a flat dial tone.
You wouldn't dial a wrong number twice, right?
Have a good weekend and don't let loneliness get your number. You -- and your phone -- deserve better.