When "I love you" doesn't count

I watched bits and pieces of Monday's "Bachelorette" finale -- enough to make me reflect on the complexities of life and love. Not bad for a cheesy reality TV show.

Anyway, I'm always baffled when reality shows equate "I've fallen in love with you" with "I love you."

A typical conversation often follows this pattern:

Person A: "I've completely fallen in love with you."

Person B: "I was so happy when Person A told me he loved me."

Are those two expressions really synonyms? I don't know.

It seems like "I've fallen in love with you" lacks some of the emotional depth and vulnerability that comes with saying "I love you."

Falling in love with someone signals more infatuation, while actually loving someone seems to mark a deeper relationship.

I remember on "Gossip Girl" when Chuck finally told Blair he loved her -- not by actually saying he loved her, but saying, "I love you, too." Many people thought his line wasn't as real as "I love you."

Of course, the most important thing is to find someone whose variety of "I love you" puts butterflies in your stomach.

It's a little safer than the Brendon/Rachel route from "Big Brother 12" -- saying "I love you" less than 30 days into a reality TV competition that involves slop.

I won't lie: I was disgusted and jealous at the same time.