pucker up

This Chinese man kissed his girlfriend so hard that she partially lost her hearing.

Don't worry, though. Things should be back to normal in two months.

I've been fortunate enough to never encounter anyone I'd call an entirely "bad" kisser. If worse came to worse, I'd rather suffer a ruptured eardrum than drown in someone's slobber.

I'll never forget a particularly disturbing Cosmo piece in which a female reader detailed how she told her boyfriend he was a bad kisser. She planted a really gross, sloppy one on him and said something like, "Pretty bad, huh? Well, that's how you kiss."

Ouch.

Sometimes, assuming you come out of the experience with your hearing intact, you should just appreciate the kiss alone. Too often, locking lips becomes just a way to say "hello" and "goodbye" in a relationship. When done spontaneously, it reflects a romantic innocence that can be pretty damn cute.

Wow. I am such a girl.