the butterfly effect

Listen up, ladies: I know how you can get your guy to commit to a serious relationship, stop drinking and finally find a direction in life. Ready? Here's what to do:

Break up with him.

Wait, what?

I'm serious. That's the concept addressed in this NY Observer piece about how some guys seem to become better people after a breakup. The writer calls it the Butterfly Effect. Check out this definition:

One day he’s a pot-addled caterpillar barely hanging on to his barista job, begging off brunch because he’s only got $37 in his checking account, spending his nights “playing music” (his band is going to start playing shows again really soon) and eating cheese fries, and then, six months after the breakup, he’s turned into a Monarch...

All I have to say is ouch. At the risk of sounding like an evil person, I generally expect a guy's life to be absolutely miserable after breaking up with me. Or even after I reject him.

The Butterfly Effect may cause some temporary pain, but I still think people are only willing to change so much -- even for the mate of their dreams.

I'd rather suffer temporary heartbreak after witnessing somebody's true colors early on than be misled and have my expectations shattered months later.

(via Jezebel)