yes...no means no

Here's a good piece about why guys think those indirect gentle turn-downs -- ie: "it's getting late" -- mean they still have a chance with you.

It hits on a valid point: Women are often so concerned about hurting someone's feelings, even if he's a creep, that they avoid snubbing a guy directly and end up causing even more unnecessary drama.

An excerpt:

But man I tell you whut, women are taught from such an early age never to be direct, never to risk “hurting someone’s feelings,” and they (we) end up causing so much more annoyance/pain/frustration for everyone involved because of our dancing around. Men learn early on that if they just keep pushing, they can wear women down into a yes, because it’s easier for her than to stay true to her own desires and communicate them honestly and respectfully and, yes, kindly.

That's true to some extent, but even the most direct turn-downs are hardly fail safe. Just the other weekend, I told a lingering guy I have a boyfriend.

His response?

"I bet he's not packing what I'm packing."

Needless to say, the plan -- to send my lingering stalker packing -- didn't quite get off the ground.