How to survive a long-distance relationship

This post's headline is misleading. There is no simple guide for surviving a long-distance relationship -- take it from someone who's tried nearly every uncertain form of the romantic setup.

LDRs aren't impossible. They're just difficult. Very difficult.

I revisited that stress after reading a New York Times essay, "In the current of a long-distance relationship." Consider this excerpt:

I became used to passionate greetings in dark garages used for short-term parking; exhaust fumes will forever be an aphrodisiac to me. But I never became used to the dreaded drop-offs, which were excruciating despite my attempts to mask the pain with stoicism or strained humor or complaints about the expectation of long lines at security.

Ah, the drama.