Monday, January 18, 2010

'A little bit married'

They sleep in the same bed every night. Share responsibilities for household chores. Own a pet together.

But they're not married.

Sound familiar?

This Daily Beast article points to a relationship trend among my generation: the long-term unmarried relationship. The piece is written by Hannah Seligson, author of a book that appropriately defines the trend: "A Little Bit Married."

The article describes some factors driving the mentality: postponed adulthood, career challenges, heightened access to birth control.

It's all pretty accurate. But even though more of us are becoming "a little bit married," I can't imagine the lifestyle has gotten to the point where it's something people actually enjoy.

Yes, there's some freedom in not having to put a label on your relationship.

However, I think many people enter into a "little bit married" situation with at least a remote hope it will eventually progress into real marriage.

Despite its convenience, relationship limbo can be incredibly grating. And sadly, extended stay in "a little bit married" territory often lands you in the land of "a lot disappointed."

(Not everyone's living in romantic limbo. Ledger-Enquirer reporter Katie Holland recently got engaged, and now she's chronicling her wedding-planning adventures online. Follow her here.)